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Dear reader,

Some of you will have stumbled upon my little ramblings from reading my Canada bound companions blog, chimplythebest by Sir Ian Pope. For this reason I feel duty bound to share the match report from today's lunchtime game of darts in the magnificent Edward VII pub in Stratford.

Ian, as you may know, Ian is not a naturally talented darts player. His somatatype is all wrong for a start. He needs to train up from his current ectomorph frame to more of a mesomorph/endomorph structure. I am helping in this regard, by acting as his sports nutritionist and making sure he sticks to his diet of Newcastle Brown Ale and pork scratchings. I am also trying to get him to start smoking, but he keeps giving up. Some people have no will power!

Manifestly, I am taking all the credit for his recent upturn in form. He has changed his approach to the game and even his personal motto from "The English love a looser", to "scorings for show, doubles for dough". Seriously, he has improved no end. I think this recent success has fueled his enthusiasm. We often get to 2-2 and play a tense deciding leg. I think, if we ever put money on it the pressure would be so great, spontaneous combustion would be a real possibility.

Anyway back to today. Robert was playing as well, but he hasn't had the time to develop his skills yet to be a true dartmaster. Be patient young one. So, in effect it was a 2 horse race.

Ian had a good run of darts in the first game. Scoring heavily and piling on the pressure. I was just about clinging on to his coat tails. It came down to the doubles. Ian had first shot at double 16. He missed only narrowly. A hushed silence filled the room. Not surprising as there was only the three of us in there.

I had 59 left and missed double 18 on my last dart. My heart sunk. It only takes one miss for the Pope to pounce! Unfortunately, he hit an odd number with his next dart which really messed up his finish.

I got one more chance and hit double 18 with my second dart.

And to to the next leg. Again, Ian storms off into the lead and is nearly 100 points ahead after 9 darts. It looked as if it was going to be another draw. I was playing poorly but had managed to get down to an outshot of 115, which is at the very limit of my range. However, I may not even have a shot because Ian had 3 darts for his double.

His three darts were well grouped but he couldn't get the double 16 then double 8 he required.

I stood up to the mark. A dodgey first dart strayed to the left, but landed in the treble 5. That was the 15 I needed. I was still alive. Next dart: hit the heart of the treble 20. It was still on. By this point I was in the zone and felt as if I was on autopilot.

One dart left. Double tops for to equal my highest outshot ever. BANG! It was IN! I had snatched victory from the jaws of defeat.

Darts is only a bit of fun, but that's because I won. Ian has not yet uttered a word to me. Instead he speaks to me through Robert. I hope this stops soon, otherwise it's going to be a very long flight to Canada.